Updated: Nov 8
Yes, I know, your name is really Susan Olsen. But I also know that you hate to be called Cindy Brady.
Sorry. Old habits die hard.
After four years of hateful presidential tweets and press conferences full of snark and shade, my first impulse on this wonderful morning is to figuratively grab you by your pig tails, push your face down into Trump’s humiliation, and rub your nose in it.
But I’m not going to.
Because the days of insults and over-the-top online hostility – the type of behavior that Trump introduced on a national scale and made to seem almost acceptable, the type of behavior you demonstrated during our "feud" four years ago – are over.
It’s time to return civility back into the national discourse.
It’s time to reject childish, churlish behavior from grown-ups who should know better.
Sadly, being the cult it is, Trump’s fans (you) continue to buy into any number of conspiracy theories that allow them (you) to believe he won; they (you) will continue attack anyone who challenges their (your) tenuous grasp of reality with insults and ugly names.
A decade from now, half of you will still be projecting conspiracy theories about this election, embarrassing your family members as you refuse to figuratively remove your red hats.
I suspect the other half will be too mortified to admit that they once supported such a vile, malignant tumor of a human being.
Whoops. There I go I again. This will be a hard habit to break. But I will.
For over four years, I’ve tried to understand how otherwise intelligent people – people like you – could have been sucked in by Trump’s hateful rhetoric. But as of today, I’ve stopped wondering. I no longer care. I don’t have to.
It’s time for crackpots like you and Alex Jones and all the rest to go back to the fringe where you belong.
It's time for intelligent Americans to work together, and to accept compromise.
It's time for us to behave like adults again.
It's time for those who can’t to go and sit back down at the little kids' table and let the grown-ups get to work.
And that's not snark. That's just a fact.
A Google search of either of our names instantly calls up our blow-up from four years ago. We're sure to be mentioned in each other's obituaries. Like it or not, Susan, we are "linked" together for the rest of our lives.
For that reason alone, I sincerely hope you take this time to look inward.
Please try to solve the mystery of how someone like you -- pro-choice, dedicated to animal welfare, so supportive of Mr. Reed when he died of AIDS -- could have been seduced by such a vile, unqualified man as Donald J. Trump.
And maybe one day, I'll be able to watch The Brady Bunch again without cringing.
Your former fan,